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Jordan Henderson has confessed that departing Liverpool was so agonising that it felt like a break-up to him. The midfielder has also disclosed that the ordeal was so distressing he couldn't bring himself to watch the Reds' matches following his Anfield exit.
The 35-year-old England international sent shockwaves through football when he departed Liverpool two years ago to join Saudi Pro League side Al-Ettifaq. However, within half a year, Henderson abandoned Saudi Arabia for Ajax and has since returned to English football with Brentford, though he remains wounded by his separation from Liverpool.
The former Liverpool captain enjoyed a remarkable 12-year stint at Anfield, claiming both the Premier League crown and Champions League trophy, making the departure the most challenging period of his professional life. Henderson explained: "It was a really tough period when I left Liverpool, I was there for a long period of time, 12 years.
"Leaving Liverpool itself was huge and really difficult and at any point it was going to be hard because it had been my life for so long and then it is just gone like that... so I have struggled for a period after that.
"No, I couldn't watch a lot of games, I certainly couldn't watch Liverpool. I didn't watch a lot of Premier League stuff then... probably picked the right place for that, I was half way around the world!
"Yeah, it was tough but when you leave Liverpool because I was there for so long because I had such an attachment and I dedicated a large part of my life there, when I left I found it really difficult and I suppose whatever I did or wherever I went..
"I don't know what it felt like, it felt like a break-up, it was just difficult and I think if you asked a lot of players when they left a club, not just Liverpool but when you have been at a club for so long and you have that attachment to them whether you retire or move on.
"I think for a period of time that was hard but within time things change, you move on but I would say that was probably the most difficult time."
Henderson has earned 85 caps and confessed that losing his England spot - missing out on selection for the Euros - left him fearing the worst until Thomas Tuchel recalled him. Yet his devotion to the Three Lions runs deep in his veins.
His passion for representing England was evidently a key factor behind his Premier League return with Brentford.
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Henderson is experiencing a renaissance with some impressive displays, though he also acknowledged that critics and doubters serve as motivation.
"I think I've used it as fuel throughout my career, really," said Henderson. "Everyone's different and everyone likes to approach things differently. For me, I suppose it's part and parcel of who I am. I've always had to prove something, somewhere. I don't think that will ever change sometimes."
Henderson has learned to ignore criticism over the years, allowing him to concentrate on his game.
It's taken time for him to learn how to tune out the distractions.
He stated: "When you are younger it can be tough, it is a lot easier now. And I suppose it is not bad to come through stuff like that in the end when you could come out the other side and look back.
"Of course there will be tough moments, and I am not going to lie, over the past couple of years, I have had some tough moments.
"But when you come out the other side, you look back, you think you learn a lot about yourself and it makes you stronger, makes you think differently and if you use it in the right way, it can help you and that is all I have ever tried to do.
"Of course I am not perfect and I have made mistakes in the past, throughout my career, but all I have ever tried to do is the right thing and help as many people around me as I can and try to use the negative stuff to be a better player and help my team.
"That's what I've done wherever I have been, trying to help the team as much as possible and use all the negativity as fuel and use it to make us better.
"Looking back, that is something I have always probably needed. I just feel that I have had that and have had to learn to use it as a tool in the right way and hopefully I have been because I am still here and speaking to you now which can't be a bad thing."
* An AI tool was used to add an extra layer to the editing process for this story. You can read the original story in the Mirror by clicking here.
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